T.V. = Total Violence
Wow. What a weekend for violence. Flipping on the tube this weekend was akin to putting a big stethoscope on the heartbeat of America, and that heart is beating out a heavy war drum pattern. Fights during Football, Fighting in Fallujah, Epic fights in Basketball, Fights in music award shows, Fighting Halos. A guy from the Twin Cities got in a fight with other hunters over a deer stand, stomped off and returned later with a semi-automatic weapon and killed five hunters. Yikes. 2005 will be remembered as the ‘year of the pugilist’, with the month of November counting off the heaviest casualties.
Time out people. I think someone needs to create a website like www.count-to-ten.com. On the left hand side of the screen a number counter counts up to ten while a soothing female voice helps with the count. And on the right hand side of the screen there should be rotating images of cute kittens, bunny rabbits, and other warm fuzzy things.
The misses and I went to a bowling party this weekend. I almost bought a war helmet at the local military surplus store to wear to the event. I had images of lane infringement and 14 pound glow-in-the-dark bowling balls being hurled through the air. Thankfully my paranoia was just that. Although we did get to see two people humping when we pulled into the parking lot. As we got out of our car, we noticed in the car parked next to us there were some white butt cheeks pumping hard in the passenger seat. I’m still trying to get that image out of my brain.
Thankfully the weekend ended on a high note, as the Packers, in the most civilized and respectable way, polished off the Houston Texans in a brilliant come from behind victory. And as a Packer fan living in Viking territory I was delighted to read Nick Coleman’s recap of Minnesota darling Randy Moss’ deposition comments before trial (he intentionally hit a Minneapolis traffic cop with his Lexus 430). To wit:
Q: Is it correct that you reside in Minnesota during the NFL football season?
A: Yes.
Q: Do you have a home you own here?
A: Yes
Q: And do you know the address of that home?
A: No, not off the top.
Q: What street is it on?
A: That I don’t know.
Q: Do you drive there?
A: Yeah.
Q: Do you ever look a the streets or road numbers you’re turning onto or off of?
A: Not really.
Q: You just know how to get there.
A: Right.
Precious stuff. It’s obvious that Mr. Moss is a community man and does so much for the city and state that loves him dearly. Read the whole Coleman article.